It seems like just living is enough to bring people down. Shit happens, right, well if shit happens then can anything else really happen. No, not the way I see it....if shit happens, shit happens. Sorry, fun doesn't happen, love doesn't happen, joy doesn't happen.....just a big old steamy pile of shit. That's what happens.
You may be wondering, what happened to that fellow, so happy and random and in love. Well....let's just say that he still loves, but his heart aches of coldness, frozen by the loss of the fiery warmth of his mate's love. Instead, she wants to be alone and figure things out on her own, grasp for what she felt she was missing; this leaves her man also alone, but he did not wish for it. He only agreed to it for she wanted it, said she needed it and he loved her enough to not care as much as it tormented him inside.
Later on as he discusses things with his mate expressing his feelings about how it pains him so and how he wishes that they get back together, he asks a question needing a certain answer. He said "You will come back to me right, you just need some time alone. That's fine, all I ask is that you stay loyal, don't mess around with other guys." Simple right, she said in response "I can't promise that.".......WTF??? This man has been as loyal to her as sock to a shoe and she already betrayed his trust once, and then she goes and says that it may happen again. That sucks. Makes you wonder why people can be so hurtful, he just wants to love her and spend his days with her and have kids and get a house and stuff....all she wants is...well she doesn't know.
Here this man thought that things had settled down between them and that things were going just swell, they went mother's day shopping together and had dinner and had a good time. They watched a movie and went back to his place and fooled around and loved on one another and it was a wonderful time for both of them, at least he thought. Two nights later they were together, and again it was a great night, laughter and fun for the both of them. The love, the sparks, the fire still there, as far as he knows anyways. And now today, again it's been two days and he tries to talk to her, she ignores him, he gets worried, "Oh no...dear god...let her be alright" he mutters to himself. He tries to contact her again, she responds angrily and pestered, he doesn't understand. She's feeling sick and hurting, okay, understandable. He wishes her a good day and tells her he loves her more than anything and hopes that she feels better. She ignores him again. This time, he didn't understand, still doesn't understand, why she won't express her love to him. He breaks down a bit, that empty feeling in his stomach kicks in.
Later after work. She breaks up with him again. He feels depressed and wants to kill himself, if things don't seem to get better between the two of them, he may seriously consider it. His whole life revolved around her and he doesn't want to leave her side or hurt her ever again. She makes his life worth living and she takes it away. So now that man types up in his blog what happened in a third person narrative and begins to shudder and tears stream down his face, he misses her so bad and wants her love, but he doesn't know if he will ever have it again.
He cries...and cries....and sobs......only she is worth this pain he tells himself...he must endure if he wants her back........."Please dear God......my father who art in heaven....let her come back to me........let things work out between us. Please Father.......in the name of you son Jesus Christ, I pray......Amen" He prays....an unusual thing for him, but he prays, anything that might help.
The PainStrangeBum
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